It began in January of 2015 when my friend Janie showed me a picture of Kelsey and asked if I’d met her yet. If I recall correctly, she diplomatically said, “I believe the two of you would benefit from knowing one another.” To this day, I’m not sure whether or not she was, in fact, setting us up. Either way, I recognized Kelsey as the cute girl in my Religion class. I silently resolved to sit by her the next day.
Lucky me—not only was the seat was open, but she was toting a copy of Hannah Coulter by Wendell Berry. If ever there was a sign, this must be it. I (perhaps over-)eagerly said, “Hey! Are you Kelsey? I’m Drew—Janie’s a mutual friend. I see you’re reading Hannah Coulter. I love that book! We should talk about it sometime.”
Kelsey replied kindly but noncommittally. I later learned she was terrified of me.
For the next few weeks, whenever I would see Kelsey around Belmont’s campus, I would ask her if she’d finished the book yet. The answer was always, “I’m still working on it,” or “Not quite yet.” Right around the time I was starting to wonder if she had purposefully stopped reading Hannah Coulter so she could avoid me forever, her response changed: “Yes! Let’s meet up sometime.” Belmont students that we were, Bongo Java it was.
Did we talk about the book? Absolutely not. It was a ruse, after all. (You’ll be glad to know we’ve found plenty of time to get around to talking about Hannah Coulter in our seven years of marriage.) Instead, we got to know each other. It was a pre-date of sorts, and I, for one, was smitten.
Shortly thereafter came the Snowpocalypse of February 2015. Classes were cancelled all week, so we pulled a Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. Every morning I woke up to a new email in my inbox, and every morning it was longer than the last. She wrote her smiley faces with a nose, like this. :o) She used the word “woof” as an exclamation. She was, as Wendell Berry himself would later tell her, “a fine letter writer.” (But that’s another story.) I was obsessed. I spent entire hours crafting the perfectly-nonchalant-yet-unmistakably-interested-and-hopefully-also-interesting reply before venturing out into the snow with my roommates.
After our email thread had achieved novella status, I worked up the courage to ask her if she’d go to dinner with me. She said yes and suggested Coco’s Italian Market.
I walked into class the next day and scanned the room for Kelsey. I glimpsed a snowy white knit hat with deep brown eyes underneath and my heart skipped a beat. The seats on either side of her were taken, so I settled for a friendly wave and approached her after class to make plans. Once we said goodbye, I walked back onto campus and felt like the ground had transformed into one giant trampoline. I had never felt that way before and have never felt that way since.
When date night came, the roads were still a bit icy. I drove up Princeton Avenue, found the house with the red door, and gave it a few good knocks. I met each of Kelsey’s three roommates before I saw Kelsey herself. I remember feeling overwhelmed by their kindness, like I’d just stumbled upon a haven of goodness—which, I would later learn, I most certainly had.
That night, we shared a margherita pizza and tiramisu. We talked and talked and talked and talked.
When I dropped Kelsey back off at her house, I froze and neglected to walk her to the door. Once I had watched her make her way inside, I sat in my car in shame, searching for an excuse to knock on that red door again and see her. Suddenly, it hit me: the answer was in the backseat. Our leftover pizza. I grabbed it, jumped out of the car, and jogged to the door. When Kelsey answered, I told her I would love to see her again for coffee some morning, maybe sooner than we originally planned. It was a Saturday; we decided on Monday.
We soon found ourselves staying up way past Kelsey’s bedtime, walking around campus, “studying” in the library, going out to movies and dinners, meeting each other’s friends—falling in love.
To this day, I sometimes cannot believe it. In so many ways, we were different people then than we are now. And yet, time has been one continuous journey since then—it’s really quite simple: we’ve never stopped getting to know each other.
This June, we’ll be welcoming the newest member of our family, a little boy who already communicates with us by kicking and dancing in Kelsey’s womb. Earlier I said I’d never felt like the ground was a trampoline since the moment after I made plans for my first date with Kelsey—I take that back. The ground also transformed into a trampoline as I walked out of our 20-week anatomy scan with the knowledge that we were having a baby boy.
Here’s a song I wrote during another Snowpocalypse, this time in January of 2024. It’s the greatest gift I’ve ever known to look at my life with Kelsey and realize that all I really want is more of it.
Happy Valentine’s Day, my love.
Lately, I've not had much to say
Nothing that feels ready for putting on a page
Or singing on a stage
We've been living too much life to look away
Lately, I've not had much to say
Lately, you'll fall asleep on me
It's only 7:30, but you're breathing so deeply
Growing our baby
I guess miracles take lots of energy
Lately, you'll fall asleep on me
Oh, I don't want for much
All that I want
Is more of what I've already got
Lately, we got COVID-19
Feels like a stupid movie everybody else had seen
Except for you and me
What a way to say goodbye to '23
Lately, we got COVID-19
But sooner than we can understand
This life we've made together will reach out and grab our hands
Our love will expand
And we'll lose sleep, but we'll find joy that never ends
Sooner than we can understand
Oh, I don't want for much
All that I want
Is more of what I've already got
I never had inner peace anyway
Why start all that today?
When I met you, I always said too much when I was afraid
But lately, lately, lately
I've not had much to say
But I'm still scared
Remember on Princeton Avenue
I said my life would be better lived alongside you
Do you feel that way, too?
Well, everything and nothing's changed since then, it's true
Remember on Princeton Avenue
Oh, I don't want for much
All that I want
Is more of what I've already got
Well, shit. Ya’ll are the best of us. Can’t wait to meet the Miller mini & explode with love for more Miller-y goodness, beauty & thoughtfulness in the world. 🫶
This is the sweetest story. I will love the Miller family forever!